Skip to main content

Living My Best Life Pt. 2

[Read: Living My Best Life Pt. 1]

 Day 2 of Fasting...

A few hours after publishing my last post, I was confronted by the despicable news of the Alton Sterling assassination by cops in Baton Rouge, LA. If you haven't been living under a rock and actually care about the state of humanity, you'll understand why this heartbreaking and gut-wrenching event halted my writing. I still prayed today, and meditated, and continued being intentional about declaring my expectations during this time of sacrifice and abstinence; however, it felt incredibly selfish and challenged my perception of self-preservation during times of national crisis.  I walked past a bottle of bourbon in my kitchen several times as I considered taking a shot or six to numb the lack of pain I felt regarding the most recent assassination. I felt kinda bad for not shedding a tear--that my heart, as much as I wanted it to, did not skip a beat while watching somebody's black father/husband/son/brother/neighbor get shot at close range. I know that my ability to not cry in horrific situations does not decrease the validity of my feelings. All day, I felt dry and thirsty for answers and action plans, unable to quench the thirst with wine because I'm fasting, after all, and all of my vices are gone. So I've had the tedious task of facing my emotions, or the lack thereof, head on. That's weird, always. I press forward, however, even on the rough days, because I'm determined to live my very best, most passionate, most purposeful life

I digress. Whew!

Expectations.

7/5/16 - Today, I am expecting a bridge. I am expecting a bridge to carry me from where I am to where I desire to be. I'll even build it myself. I expect to obtain or recognize the tools that will allow me to build a bridge...to build my breakthrough.

7/6/16 - Today, I am expecting an action plan. I am expecting to discover or create a plan for building, for creating, for fighting, for healing. In moments like these, I struggle to find my place in the movement towards justice and healing. I'm learning that my placement in the movement/in life will be connected to my passion . I am anticipating an action plan that will get me from my passion to my placement.

I am expecting to build a bridge that will carry me from my passion to my placement.

 Plan: Passion. Bridge. Placement.



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Call to Slowdown

On March 30, 2017, I wrote a caption under a picture I posted of me preaching my very first public sermon in James Chapel at Union Theological Seminary in the City of New York. The sermon was entitled, “I Have an Issue of Blood.” To my surprise, at the end of my moment of sermonic exploration – what was originally supposed to be a spoken word piece but quickly grew into something beyond my wildest imagination – I got a standing ovation. It was… odd . I thought to myself, “Why are these people standing and clapping for me? I’m not a preacher.” Folks came up to me after to convey their appreciation for the message. Someone in the congregation shared a picture they took of me. I posted it on Instagram and Facebook the next day with the caption: “I sometimes feel like there's a person running ahead of me—the person that God is calling me to be—and I'm running behind her trying to catch up as she runs faster and faster. And I don't know where's she's going but I know i...
1 comment
Read more

Cracked Eggs, Nerf Guns, and the Murder of Karon Blake

  Cracked Eggs, Nerf Guns, and the Murder of Karon Blake At the time of my writing this, I am sitting in my big chair, staring at my front window from inside the house, looking at the drippings that have stained the glass from the eggs that some neighborhood kids hurled at my window almost two weeks ago. They were mad at me (I suppose) because they came to steal another package off my front porch in December, but they did not know that it was a package I’d planted with a note inside. I had them on camera stealing several packages on my block during the winter break, including one of mine that contained dog food (I know they were disappointed when they opened that one up ha!). Instead of calling the police or posting their faces on the many neighborhood apps, I decided to take an old amazon box, place a note inside, retape it and leave it on the porch. The note read: “God loves you. I care about you. Stop stealing packages. -Pastor Mac.” I wanted these 3 kids who look like the...
Post a Comment
Read more

For those of us who live in war zones

  For those of us who live in war zones right here in the US... who see the teens running inside "somebody shootin 'round da cornuh," they shout who see the kids just tryna work on their layups in beautiful 62 degree weather grab their balls and sprint for cover "what's alla that, man?" who see the young woman running downhill away from potential death away from her home who see the grandma get up from her post-church porch sit and crawl away from her peace and into her prison Nobody should live like this We are at war RIGHT HERE Everything is connected Liberation is a global pursuit For those of us who live in war zones I see you
Post a Comment
Read more