I Refuse to Sing the Blues

I don't have a song for you today
All I feel is black and blue
Only pain and sorrow came this way

I don't have a song for you
I don't even know my name
All I hear are minor chords
All I feel is somber tunes
But I --

I refuse to sing the blues

I refuse to write another song about the troubles of my day
I refuse to vent, so maybe I'll just scat my blues away
It'll give me the words to say...

I refuse to be angry
I will turn my day around
I will sing until my withered soul arises from the ground

Not inspired. I'm just tired.

And I don't have a song for you
But I found a song me
And it's come to set me free

I refuse to sing the blues

Comments

"We Thought You'd Be Next." 💍👰🏾🤪

Recently, my little brother got engaged. 🎉 But can I just say, Hashtag Triggered?! 😑
I was very thrilled that he finally proposed to his now fiance and that I absolutely love her. She is so sweet and brings goodness into his world. I'm so excited for them. However, during my last trip home to New Orleans, a family member was chatting with me about it and asked about my relationship, and then proceeded to say,
"I thought you'd be next." 😣
B*TCH, ME TOO! DAMN!
I did not say this aloud as I was in my father's house (#shondo #imchurchy), but everything in my body tensed up. Every hair stood up on my boiling skin and my heart began palpitating as I attempted to calmly explain why I wouldn't "be next" while simultaneously trying not to burst into tears in front of company. I started rambling about my burgeoning career--about "our" careers--and attempting to refocus the conversation while wanting to jump into the large pot of red beans simmer…

How My Mom Made Me A Preacher

When I was a kid, I used to travel with my mom to Toastmasters conferences. I went to Baton Rouge, Lafeyette, Atlanta, DC, Florida, down the street from the house, up the street from her job, everywhere. I heard some of the world's greatest speakers. I sat in many executive meetings (because my mom didn't wanna leave me in hotel rooms by myself...she watches too much Law and Order) and I behaved quietly, pretending to doodle but really eavesdropping on conversations regarding new judging procedures and managing leadership conflict (yes, grown people cat-fight🙀). I was present for speaking competitions that my mother judged, training seminars that my mother presented, and galas that I attended with my mother as her young, but show-stealingly adorable, date.👧🏽
And of course, my mother took Toastmasters home with her. Whenever I had to speak in church or prepare a speech for class, she mentored me. She made sure I had a bomb 💣acronym (she's obsessed with corny acronyms)…

Who Holds The Chaplain? (Part II) - Saying "Goodbye"

Welcome to a series of reflections on my experience as a chaplain-in-training thus far. Each post will contain a brief written reflection paired with a 10-min vLog. I hope you enjoy.
View Who Holds The Chaplain (Part I) here.

One of the things about chaplaincy that I'm learning to deal with is saying "goodbye"-- Goodbye to patients. Goodbye to families. Goodbye to those who are transitioning from this life. Good to the families of those who are transitioning from this life. Goodbye to those who are (thankfully) going home or to a less critical facility. Goodbye.
Over the past couple of weeks, I've built relationships with some folks who I've had to say goodbye to. Mostly good goodbyes. I recently said "goodbye" to Ms. Jane*, my home-girl in her fifties who I spent a lot of time with, having in-room bible studies and just all-around great conversation. She left over a week ago to go to a physical rehab facility--one step closer to home. I'm happy f…

God and Wine

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